Dissociation is a gift. I have it. I need it. I am very sensitive in mind and body. I believe it is one of the overexcitabilities of giftedness.
I use this ability to put my emotions aside and feel others. This allows me to meet their needs. This is extreme empathic skill.

We are not taught how to use our somatic intelligence. Or in your case the integrated intelligence of somatic and cognitive. But we should be. It is big picture giftedness.

I am a savant with unified intelligence of the somatic and cognitive. For my childhood I was told there was something very wrong with me. In adulthood I was told it was a form of genius.
Fuck them all for that. I was denied learning about how to be my best self so our society could gaslight me into serving them at a very high expense.

Now I am a researcher in this space. Because being denied your giftedness can drive one to suicide. I don't want that to continue to happen.

We are looking at this all wrong. You are demonstrating an amazing skill. Being a good girl was denying how it worked.