I dropped my parents so I could wipe the trauma slate clean. I see too many parents catering to their parents. Rolling the trauma forward in doing so. Expecting their children to do the same (even if it is to a lesser degree).
My choice was to focus on my children and the (harsh) future they are facing. Not my very needy and demanding parents and easy childhood they never grew up from. I have one life to live. My parents made their bed and it is lonely and dysfunctional. I have made mine healthy as to include my children forever.

I have a daughter like yours. I was a daughter like yours. I knew if I did not meet her where she was at she would not need me later nor want me. So I dropped my family origin to keep their trauma with them and it worked.
I see my younger siblings repeating the cycle. They can't see what is coming for them. They are stuck to our mother lamenting their children's flaws. Not looking at their own. They will spend the rest of their lives in a peverse hierarchy serving the generation prior. Why can't we let our parents go. Their weakness is an anchor in a sea that is getting deeper and my tumultuous. At least my parents were poor. I didn't have the money so many use to tie their children to the dysfunction. It's funny how poverty makes us be our very best. We have no space for mistakes.