The causes of estrangement.
Divorce - If there is no family due to divorce is it really estrangement? You did not get a family. It's like keeping in contact with the orphanage that raised you.
Society - the focus on making you the best tool for society and not your best self means we all grow up needing much more love than we received. We are not kind to our children. Our education and medical systems pathologize the most sensitive. Why would anyone stay if they meet someone or a group that actually does love them unconditionally.
Narcissism - it starts by being broken young. My youngest sister is a narcissist like our parents. My other siblings and I married them. I divorced quite young and married another echoist. This allowed me to heal. The rest are trapped repeating the cycle.
Competition is fostered - I ( the oldest child) was the closet thing we had to a parent. I am just a few years older than my siblings. I walked away when they told me I stole them from my parents, because I was selfish. I needed their love and stole them. I was 5 when the youngest was born. I didn't steal they were handed to me. We were taught this to keep us from attaching to each other in our society and homes. Competition destroys connection. Game theory is a giant lie. You are a narcissist and an idiot of you can't see this.
We trivialize everything having to do with good mental health. Our therapists are piss poor because they do not realize our emotions are an extension of our intellect. Our society is the cause. It broke our parents. It used their sensitivity against them. We imported the Nazi structure to make an industrial war complex. We deserve this pain for not stopping what our country has done to the rest of the world. For not being kinder better humans.
Collectively Americans are the world's psychopaths. We made this bed and now we must lie in it.
We are all too focused on our pain to see the big picture. Because we are societally narcissistic. Everything in our systems makes us look inward and fix or blame. Healthy people focus outward. The inward is for processing the big picture. Our systems have used our own emotions to blind and trap us in dysfunction.
